Why do people trade Love for Hate?

As a person that has led people ever since I was eighteen, and have always strived to learn more about people so I could better lead. I know I'm not where I want to be as a leader, but I'm learning and growing every year. There is one thing that I have noticed in a small group of people that I just don't get (I'm Lost) I try to understand but just don't get it! What is it? It's the action of walking away from everybody and everything that is loving and good and chasing people and things that are not.

You might be saying "people don't do that!" but I would say with confidence that they do, and it's happening every day. Anybody that cares about people has seen it a number of times and no matter if we know that person personally or not, it breaks our heart. So many people suffer from this and even know the number of people that do this type of thing is a minority, it affects everybody at some point in our lives, if not directly most definitely indirectly. So what does it look like?: It's the parent that neglects their child/children, the child that rebels against their parents, the spouse that abandons their husband/wife, or the person that walks away from their entire family, to name a few.    So what makes these people they are moving toward harmful? That's easy. Anybody that allows you to walk away from a loving and nurturing support system is not only harmful but hateful, not only to the loving support system but to you! If they were truly caring and loving they would support and encourage the continued relationship with the people that love you. I don't get it, maybe because, even know I've done lot's of things I wish I could change or do better, I have never walked away from a loving support system or loved ones, and I most definitely wouldn't have done it in favor of a person or group of people that showed contempt toward my future. So I ask why? 

If you are more enlightened to this situation than me please share and comment to help me understand why this happens. Maybe you were that person, and were blind to it and now you see, whatever it might be please share anything you believe will help understand and help families and individuals deal with this tragedy.

It's My Life!

We all know life can be hard, and our own bad decisions can make it
a lot tougher, but the worst is when someone else's bad decisions make our life tougher!  A person's willingness to do something knowing it will cause other great pain is a great indicator of how truly selfish that person is, and when the person causing all the pain is a loved one it increases the pain tenfold. Most, if not all of us have been affected by a loved one that says with their mouth they love us, but their actions say something very different. With the excuse being; "it's my life!" Really? It's my life! I wonder sometimes if people really believe that they have the moral right to make difficult, destroy, dishonor, and just plain make others miserable in the name of "It's my life!"? I think back to my days as a teenager and I have no doubt, that some of my decisions hurt others, but I can say with sincerity that it wasn't with the attitude of it's my life, as a matter of fact, there was a number of times that I choose not to do something for the sake of others and as I got older, I became more aware and intentional about making decisions for the good of others too. I get it we all want to have control of our life, but when we have control of anything including ourselves it's not without responsibility, and part of that responsibility is for the concern and care of others that are connected to us. I know that believing in a creator, and one that is personal and cares about our daily life concerns plays a part, actually is a huge reason why I care about the feelings of others, and why I believe that we're all in this together not for competition, but community.  All too often I have seen people suffer huge, because a child, parent, or spouse decided that their so-called happiness was more important than the rest of the family and they needed to do their thing regardless of what it would cause to everybody else, and unfortunately, there are people that would lead them to believe, that it's not only ok but needed for their happiness.

To make things worse years later the person is still not happy but they have also succeeded in hurting the ones they claim to love because happiness is never obtained through selfishness but rather selflessness.  This is not a letter to shame or condemnation, but of pleading. I plead with you for your future self and for your loved ones that are hurting with and for you, stop attempting to live as though your alone on an island and live as though the island is full of people that love you and are affected by your choices and will do whatever it takes to help you succeed in life because ultimately your life is theirs too.

Letter to that guy

To all the little boys out there who think their men. You know the ones. The ones that think they can treat young ladies like their property, like something they wear, get tired of it and throw away. The ones that take beautiful princesses and make them feel that they are less than. They are the ones that take these precious little girls, those little girls that were created by God, and treat them like an ordinary skipping rock. Yes, these beautiful souls were created to be honored, protected, and loved like a perfectly cut diamond that was made for a special purpose, and created for a perfect setting, to be worn and cherished and protected by one person forever. But you chose to take that beautiful precious diamond and use it for a skipping rock and wonder why everybody seems to hate on you. Let me inform you; people aren't hating on you their loving on the one your hating on.
  One day you may have a precious daughter and hopefully, you will come to a realization how foolish you were, but until then do your community and every other human being a favor and move to an island with all your fellow fools and live there, for let says the rest of your life. Or at least until you grow up and realize that loving someone requires selfless sacrifice, a sacrifice for which you know nothing about.

I know your name and I know your game, telling her; "no one else understands you like I do" only works while she is blinded and then it all comes crashing down, but unfortunately by the time they see you for who you really are they have already been taking down a path of hurt, pain, and regret, that will affect the rest of their life, of course, that doesn't bother you because your intention was to get what you could for as long as you could. I know you want to make her feel like she's broken so she will hold tightly to you, the only one that can fix her, at least that's the lie you tell her, but in all reality, you are the one broken, and unfortunately broken people like to break others. I just want you to understand that you're not fooling anybody else and you will pay for your lying and manipulating ways. Yes, I know you think you have gotten away with something, but believe me, you haven't, you have only temporarily taken down another person with you. Understand when I tell you; love is more about what you do than what you say, so don't be surprised when the people that really do love that precious young lady that you so shamelessly use, end up doing everything in their power to make you a distant memory, and please don't talk about love as if you know what it means because you got as much clue about love as you do about being a decent human being. I will end by saying I really do hope and pray that you actually wake up and see that you too are valuable under all that loserness, but for the sake of us all; leave our nieces, sisters, daughters, and granddaughters alone while you figure out yourself.